I think one of the hardest parts about going away to school is the fact that not only are you making a huge transition in your life, but the pressure behind it all to feel like you are having a good time.
No matter what the Instagram captions say, no matter how fun the Snapchats look, and no matter how many times a person tweets, “College is the best thing ever!”, everyone is having trouble adjusting.
Personal thoughts: The first four weeks here, I felt great. College seemed to be my kingdom. I was getting A’s on tests and quizzes, joining a sorority, exploring new clubs, and overall just making great new friendships.
Don’t get me wrong. All of those things were happening and I was having a very carefree time. But after the first weeks wore off, I began to feel the pain of being in a new environment away from my friends of 15 years, away from my family, and away from a familiar setting.
College is not perfect. You don’t arrive on campus and feel instantly at home. You will probably take more L’s than W’s, and it’s going to be tough. You will wish you went somewhere closer to home, or that you stayed there all together. When the parents come on family weekend, it’s hard not to hop on the plane back with them (though I have heard of a few who have).
We are told that it is okay to feel this way, but if we talk about it openly, it’s seen as a lack of acceptance or the wrong place, not growing pains.
And that is why the generation of social media savvies present themselves with the WINNING attitude. The superficial idea that we’ve made lots of friends, that college is the best place on earth, and that we are overall doing great. College is supposed to be the best four years of our life, and we aren’t wasting a second to cash in on that deal. Heaven forbid we don’t seem to be having as much fun as our peers are (although they are probably thinking the same thing.
I could sit here and write that it will all get better with time, but I’ve never done this before. I’ve only been in college for seven weeks.
What I can say is make the small moments count. It’s helped me feel more at home here at TCU. Stressful night of studying? Dance party. A week that sucked the life out of you? Netflix yourself in and out of the weekend. Feeling lonely? Prop open your dorm door and see who pops in. Social life problems? Late night pizza. Feel like you need to get your feelings out? Talk to a friend, call your mom, or create a blog (I do all three).
Focus on what makes you happy, not what you can put online so that others think you are happy, even if you aren’t.
It takes a lot to say that you aren’t doing too well. When college is $55,000 a year, it doesn’t feel acceptable to not be doing great. But everyone feels this way eventually.
At least I think they do.
Much love this Friday,
Kendall